Thursday, June 01, 2006

Back away from the edge

It’s lawn care season out here in the ‘burbs. And that means one thing—edging. For you city folk, edging is the process whereby grass is trimmed back from the edges of sidewalks and other man-made or natural barriers. It’s very important
My dad was never big on edging (in fact he is not big on lawn work period), so I never learned it from him. I used to just let the grass row onto the sidewalk. But I’ve noticed that nearly everyone in my town does it. My neighbor is particularly good at it, which is surprising since he’s an old hippie. So, peer pressure is getting to me and I am making an effort to edge.
In my walks around Hawthorne, I’ve noticed three types of edgers. The ones who don’t do it (like me). The ones who do it well (my neighbor). And the pathological ones. The pathological ones taking edging to an extreme.
There is one of these pathological edgers down the street from me. He’s got about a 2 to 3-inch strip of dirt between the grass and the sidewalk. Every time I walk by his house I feel a little creeped out.


AJ said...

I can relate, Lori got me a rechargable edger early last year and I love it. Not so much for edging, which I do with a modicum of attention, but for the grass along the fences, trees, deck, etc. where the mower doesnt reach.

We have some of those extreme edgers here and I've noticed they have their own particular styles as well. One guy in my neighborhood edges at a very deep angle so there's a 4" deep v-shaped moat between the sidewalk and the grass - I'm kinda concerned someone's going to twist an ankle. Or maybe he's planning on filling it with water and baby alligators. Another guy has the edge right up against the sidewalk with a very narrow - but very well defined - crease between the walk and grass. As if he dares the grass to grow that extra 1/8 of an inch and tresspass into concrete's territory.
There must be some sort of support group for these people. But then again, maybe it's just that kind of lawn control they need to keep from shooting up a mall or chopping up the family. Who knows but I steer clear just to be safe.

Eric said...

I wonder if the pathological edging phenomenon is the lawncare equivalent of biting your fingernails.

Philadaddy said...

Last time I was over your place I heard some chanting coming from behind the hedge: ONE OF US...ONE OF US...ONE OF US...ONE OF US...
I suggest listening to a lot of 80s punk rock immediately. Start with Suburban Home by the Descendents.

Sharon Baron said...

Poor Ed! No one actually cares if you edge or not. Stop beating yourself up! Take a stand as a "non-edger" and just let it go, or plant ground cover and you will never have to think about the lawn again.

He'd much prefer "former hippie".

liberal elite said...

He'd much prefer "former hippie".

Yeah, he gave me an earful last night. I'm afraid of what he might do to my lawn.

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